Wednesday, 19 June 2013

Labour politician ‘fathered a child with an alien’

A Labour councillor has claimed he fathered a child with an alien - and he has sexual relations with the extra-terrestrial about four times a year.

Simon Parkes, a 53-year-old driving instructor and married father-of-three who sits on Whitby Town Council, said his wife was ‘very unhappy’ with the revelation.

He added: ‘But it is not on a human level, so I don’t see it as wrong.'

He made the comments speaking on Channel 4’s documentary, Confessions of an Alien Abductee.

Where to begin with this one, I found it funny that his wife was ‘unhappy’, yes I’m sure she was, because when she saw it I can imagine she thought to herself oh s**t I’m married to a bona-fide nutcase.

I also feel sorry for the poor teenagers of Whitby who have to take driving lessons with him; although I’m guessing after this announcement demand for him will drop, imagine driving along a country lane and he turns to you and says this weekend I’m meeting up with my alien lover for our quarterly shag.

I bet the Tory and Lib Dem councillors in Whitby can’t believe their luck, and I bet the Labour ones are banging their heads in disbelief, because how would you take anything they proposed at a meeting seriously after this.


Although there will always be a place for him in the Monster Raving Loony Party, and the Whitby mental health facility.  

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